These past couple of months I've been trying to understand things--going through a phase I guess. And one thing I've continually prayed for is for me to feel loved and to show love to others. I'm a quiet person at first and I really want to reach out to more people. To have community. So I've been praying for boldness and love. But during this phase I've been really hard on myself. I realized I needed to step up. And I also realized that I wasn't receiving love from anyone else. What helped me realize all of this was Blue Like Jazz. Donald Miller said "God's love will never change us if we don't accept it." And it's true. I've been longing to change but it never seemed to happen. I don't always accept love from other people nor from God.
A big part of accepting God's love is to accept myself for who I am. All of me. I feel that women continually compare themselves to others--wishing they had their hair, their body, their brains, talent, confidence, personality, faith...it gets EXHAUSTING. And often I, and many others, feel that so-and-so is better because so-and-so is this-or-that. This is distorted thinking.
"For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”
1 Samuel 16:7
Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. -1 Peter 3:3-4
"The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we are comparing our behind the scenes to everyone else's highlight reel" - S. Furtick
The reason I feel the need to write about this is because this is something that I, and the rest of the world, struggle with the most in life. It's something that I have been praying over for a long time, and now all of a sudden I keep finding these words from God and others on the same subject. God loves us so deeply. We are ALL beautiful. We live in such a broken society that focuses too much on the importance of outward appearance. It's nearly impossible to live in this country, as a woman, and to not have any insecurities. I've grown up seeing women on TV and feeling like I could never look like that. And now I constantly feel the need to wear make-up wherever I go. Most women do. We don't feel pretty unless we are covering our natural beauty and also our insecurities. It's sad. Our world is so broken.
Type in "natural beauty" on Google and the first thing that pops up is an article called "15 Ways to be a Natural Beauty"...really? We are all already naturally beautiful. Yet I am so broken in this area that I actually read through the article to figure it out for myself. The point I'm trying to make is that each of us are beautiful in our own ways. God made us each individually and gave us talents to use for His Glory. If you don't believe me, check out Psalm 139. We must not only accept ourselves for who we are, but also lift each other up in fellowship and community. "Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God." Romans 15:7
My prayer for all of us is to love ourselves, each other, and most importantly our Father. And to also allow ourselves to be freed from numbness so we can feel the love that others and God have for us.
"How many are your works, O Lord!
In wisdom you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures." Psalm 104:24
